A Message to a Friend

Understanding the loss of a friend is an ordeal I have yet to come to terms with. April 30th, 2007 I lost a good friend of mine. My heart ached but my mind had not accepted the reality. It is now going on over a week since her death and we are just now coming upon her funeral. My heart is racing more than ever with the fear of seeing her really gone. I am afraid that I won't be able to cope.

I just wanted to take this time out, while I still have my sanity, to say that I love her and miss her very much. She was very dear to me and I struggle with the idea that I wasn't a good enough friend. I want her to know that I wanted to be and I want her to know that I'm sorry I wasn't there. I know, if she could, she would describe to me the moment she knew her time had come. She would say "C.C., that's when I knew. I just Knew". I pray for her family daily, and pray God will deliver the message for me. Life does go on but not without remembrance. I love you Deb.

In loving memory of Deborah Clay.